Herself speaks.
Bodily issues today. You have been warned.
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I do my best not to flinch during the exam. My efforts are always in vain, though, because it is not at all comfortable. The issues have become increasingly problematic over time, and no amount of mentally willing things to be better or to go away has been successful.
"It's time to do surgery to fix that," my ob/gyn said.
He's right. It doesn't make it any less... unpleasant, though.
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He and I had discussed the matter before -- I have a lengthy and somewhat fraught medical history when it comes to ladybits, and this particular problem has waxed and waned over the years. We've tried to resolve the matter with medications, but those are not without their own problematic side effects.
It's just the way I was made, with temperamental and sensitive and delicate components. No one's fault, just a quirk of nature. (Given the choice, I would most definitely choose some other quirk of nature to tackle. Something that involved an elbow or a foot or even a kidney or something else besides ladybits.) I was dealt an unfortunate hand.
I try not to be bitter. Sometimes, though, I think about the fact that for much of my post-puberty youthful years, I was often plagued by rumors about being promiscuous. And the truth of the matter is that even if I wanted to amply sample the available... wares out there, I would not be able to do so, because the ladybits would not have cooperated. They require special consideration.
Oh, well. Maybe in another life, I will be able to be a successful courtesan.
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Surgery was scheduled for today, but had to be rescheduled since I caught Offspring the Third's COVID. I would like the wait not to be too long, because I am very ready to move forward now that the decision has been made. I need to temper my expectations - it will not be a quick fix to solve all the issues. It might provide some solid years of relief, though. I don't know how painful it might be. At least they are doing me the service of knocking me out completely; I cannot fathom tolerating matters while awake.
Surgery is always a risk. I try not to think about what will happen if something goes wrong. It makes me queasy. It's best not to imagine worst-case scenarios in this situation.
I am... not happy. But I have reached the point when something needs to be done to make things better. Hopefully, this will help.
We shall see. Stay tuned.
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