The Ant Wife

 In Aesop's fable of the Grasshopper and the Ant, the Grasshopper enjoys the summer sun, singing merrily without a care in the world, while the Ant toils, taking care of today's work and putting away food stores for the winter. And at the end of the fable, when the cold weather begins, Ant is well-prepared, while Grasshopper suffers. (Most re-tellings have Ant closing the door in Grasshopper's face after scolding Grasshopper for not preparing adequately. It is a bit cruel. But most fables and fairy-tales of old are.) Moral as old as time: work hard and plan for eventualities and possibilities. Don't put off what should be done; take care of business before pleasure. 

This has been my modus operandi for as long as I can remember. Do the Things. Take care of Stuff. Business before Pleasure. Always -- as a student, as an employee, and in relationships, too. 

I am an Ant Wife. 

I have always done what is best for the Family. I am the Wife that the Offspring need as a mother. I am the Wife that changed careers entirely (including The Task) for the benefit of the family unit. I am the Wife that maintains the household, pays the bills, buys the groceries, takes the pets to the vet, tends to all the 100 little tasks of every day life, so that my little Family can live their best possible lives with as few worries as possible. 

I am not a Grasshopper Wife who can travel easily or set aside all of my Ant Wife obligations quickly to go out without a bit of planning (this was especially true when the Offspring were younger and still at home). Nevertheless, the good news is, with a bit of foresight and assistance, all the Ant Tasks can be addressed so that it is possible to take an Ant Wife on Grasshopper experiences.  (And I can say, an Ant Wife does enjoy a Grasshopper Moment, especially with the knowledge that all the Ant Tasks are momentarily not her obligation.)

On the other hand, the converse cannot be said of Grasshoppers; they cannot be easily trained to function as Ants. To be an Ant requires perseverance, patience, commitment -- not qualities that Grasshoppers have in abundance. Hard to wait and tend to mundane aspects of life when you are a Grasshopper springing without forethought from moment to moment.

So, let us raise a toast to the Ant Wives. Forever in the background, making sure that the world runs smoothly for the people we love, so that they can have their Grasshopper Moments. And, hopefully, teaching them quietly the ways of being an Ant, too, so that they will be well prepared for their lives ahead.