Creature Comfort

 Herself speaks.

I've hit a figurative wall. 

We've officially passed the one-year mark for the first Pandemic lockdown. It's been about 15 months since I've seen any of my family of origin in person. And 9 months since I've seen Cherished Friend in person. It's been 13 months since I've gone to the gym. It's been that long as well since I've shopped at a grocery store, visited a bookstore, looked for new clothes in person. Eaten inside a restaurant. Gone to a movie theater. Gone anywhere purely for the pleasure of going there. 

I keep busy with work and other tasks. But isolation and loneliness have crept in underneath everything. 

I do see Beloved Husband, of course; he has been exceptionally busy with work, though, and that takes its toll on his ability to be available for companionship. The Offspring are occupied living their own Pandemic lives. I do see my family of origin and Cherished Friend by Zoom on occasion, and that helps a bit. Still, everyone is just full up with Getting By right now. I'm hesitant to ask for more time from anyone. I know that my ability to give time and attention is limited, because Exhausted, and it's likely they all feel the same. I don't want to be a burden on anyone. 

My heart aches. It does every spring, and now, more than ever, this Pandemic spring. 

I've tidied my possessions -- sometimes, putting my spaces in order helps alleviate the ache. It has not done so yet, though. 

I am at the point of new pet acquisition. I may ask whether I can adopt a pair of the Beans. Because nothing soothes the heart quite like the ability to make a small fur creature comfortable.