The Body

Herself speaks.
Serious topic today, including brief general discussion of abuse and sexual assault survivors. Skip over today if you are not feeling strong. 

One of my Facebook acquaintances posted a meme yesterday that had me grinding my teeth.  I won't share it, because so much wrong. It was a photograph with a small wiry man of indeterminate race, wearing scrubs, and the word "doctor" before his name; it had text that read "Dr. [XX] says, no one must die of cancer except out of carelessness", and provided three "simple steps" to conquer cancer. The steps included stopping all sugar intake; drinking a glass of hot lemon juice first thing in the morning; and having three spoonfuls of organic coconut oil morning and night. These three steps will apparently cause cancer to disappear.

No. Just no. What is wrong with people, that they believe these things?

Not to mention: hello, victim blaming. If you still have cancer? You must have been 'careless' in following this regimen.

No.

Cancer is a multivaried, unpredictable disease, wrought by changes at the microbiological level. While yes, diet and habits (e.g., smoking) may have an impact on the development of cancer, it is foolish in the extreme to believe that a deliberately simple intake (or lack thereof) of common household ingredients would change the course of the disease.

The body does what it does. We are merely passengers in the body; we tend to the body as best we can, but it still invariably does unusual or unpleasant things from time to time.

Think of the breast lumps I have -- did I do something to cause them? Or not do something, that thereby resulted in their development? Can I do something now to make those clumps of (mercifully benign) cells disappear? Unlikely. They are just the way things are.

Think of Offspring the Third's ingrown toenail that necessitated mechanical intervention -- did he do something to cause it to grow in a peculiar fashion? No. That is just the way it was.

Or think of Offspring the First, who required surgery at age five to correct a congenital issue with one of her internal organs. Congenital. Present at birth. No amount of change in my antenatal diet, or in her postnatal diet, could change the way she was formed.

We are amazing conglomerates of cells. It's fascinating and mysterious that cells should work together so well to form a cohesive organism. It's not at all surprising, given the complexity, that things should malfunction from time to time.

Let's step back from the cellular level and look at the larger picture: we will still find that the body does what it does, regardless of what we think, say or do.

The first time Offspring the Third had his ingrown toenail addressed, I sat in the room with him to bring him comfort and support. It was fine; I focused on him and talked him through it. All went well. But when everything was over, all of sudden I felt hot and queasy and as though I might faint. Such a thing had never happened before -- my body reacted quite differently from what my otherwise unremarkable emotional state led me to believe it would do.

It happened again several months later, when I was in the emergency room with an aged relative; even though all was well and there was nothing unusual happening, my body reacted poorly. I excused myself to the restroom and put my head between my knees for a few minutes until equilibrium was reestablished. I was mystified as to why my body reacted the way it did -- yet, that's what happened. It was not within my mental control. So I did what I had to do to tend to the body in the moment.

Let's broaden further. Think about survivors of abuse and assault  -- how does the body react? Survivors talk about disassociating from the body, shutting down, freezing; but also, of reacting in an unexpected physical way. The body (and the primitive reptilian brain that pilots it) may behave in a way completely contrary to what the higher brain thinks should happen. What the physical body finds tolerable, even pleasurable, may be far beyond what the mind finds remotely acceptable.

This is no doubt why male sexual assault survivors are so hesitant to come forward or to even acknowledge that what happened to them was assault, with society telling them: if you had an erection or an orgasm, you must have wanted it. Can you imagine the confusion and despair of your body reacting physiologically to something that you psychologically do not want to happen? It happens to women too. Didn't you enjoy it? You must have secretly wanted it. Blaming the victim, once more. What a terrible thing to do.

Never has the division between body and mind been clearer:
The body does what it does. We are merely passengers.

It can be quite the unexpected ride.