Celery Sticks

Herself attended a social function briefly yesterday evening.  There were present some people of whom she is fond and whom she has not seen in quite a while, so it was a relatively pleasant time. It is good to get out of the house once in a while.

Today, she is still contemplating a brief conversation she had with two women at the function.  Both women -- each attractive, well-coiffed and tastefully made up -- are tiny, athletic and incredibly fit ladies (TAIFL) of about the same age as Herself.  The topic:  food and dietary habits. The general discussion went somewhat as follows (words may not be exact, but gist is accurate):

TAILF1: I really shouldn't eat any more. But I only ate once today.  We went to a birthday party earlier and I was so good, I didn't have any cake or anything.  I'll have a little bit more of this - I'll just have to run an extra mile to run it off. 

Herself: Oh, it's the holidays, it's OK.

TAILF2:  That's no excuse.

Herself: Sure it is, once in a while.

TAILF2:  Really, it isn't.

:::sigh:::

Herself was relieved to return to the safety of her home after the function, where she could make dinner for the Menfolk (Beloved Husband, Offspring the Second, Offspring the Third, and Cherished Friend) and sit quietly on the couch watching Top Gear and not have to worry about what she ate or didn't eat, how much she exercised or didn't exercise, or whether anyone scrutinizes her appearance.  They are her sanctuary, the Menfolk:  they allow her to be human, to be flawed, to try and fail and try again.  She does not feel judged in their presence. She wants to better herself for them, rather than out of fear of what they may think of her.  

The question remains: are the TAIFL right?

On the one hand, they are correct - being extremely watchful about what they eat and how much they exercise clearly contributes to their states of beauty and fitness. Certainly, Herself could be far more diligent and circumspect about what she eats and how much she exercises. Without question, she'd be less hefty if she did.  No getting around that fact.

Nevertheless: to watch every single mouthful - to deny oneself a slice of a birthday celebration, to demand physical 'repayment' for any perceived excess calorie consumed - seems extraordinarily difficult. Almost obsessive.  And self-punitive.

Herself despairs.

She shall not -- cannot -- think about it any more.

Life is too short for self-hatred and celery sticks. - Marilyn Wann