Last of 50

Herself speaks.

Today is the last day of my 50th year.

It's been a long year.

A year ago, I did not look forward to turning 50. It was such a dreaded milestone. And then, suddenly, there I was. And it was OK, in its own way.

Two-thirds of my 50th year was consumed by The Task - application, preparation, and The Task itself. By the time I receive the results, it will have been a full 11 months of time, that will forever be associated with 50. Let us hope that it, like 50, becomes a thing of the past.

-----
This evening, as I sat alone with the small dogs on the back patio, I thought about goals for the year ahead. What will I do? What creative endeavors will I attempt? How much camping can I squeeze into the year? How will I tame the beast of loneliness that lurks in the corners?

How will I learn to handle with Grace, the Things over which I have no control?  How do I meet the needs of others, without giving away too many pieces of myself in the process?  How do I learn to ask for what I Need (and to care for myself when asking goes unanswered)? And how do I mold my soul to be as self-sufficient as possible? These seem like complex tasks. Yet, I have all the time in the world -- each and every day -- to figure it all out.

If I had only one birthday wish, though: what I want, most of all, is that the Offspring flourish in the upcoming year.

What will 51 bring? We shall see.