Herself speaks.
Today's entry is an offshoot of yesterday's ruminations on what it means to be Alone. The issues herein are different from those of yesterday, and were not raised by my lovely friend who first provided the kernel of "Alone." Nevertheless, this is a companion contemplation, as it relates to "The One" -- the mythical One who will banish Alone-ness.
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Sometimes, we seek to find our own value outside ourselves: if I make that much money, if I receive that award, then I will clearly be successful. Or if I have that house, that car, that job. Or, most of all, if I have that One. We all know the paragon of the One from books and movies and television: the person who cares for us, who would do anything for us, who arrives in our darkest moments to save us, making us feel valuable and treasured and loved. The thought is this (either directly, or subconsciously):
If -- and only if -- I have such a One, do I have any worth.
Here is what I wish for you to know:
There is no One. Your value depends on no One, and on no Others.
The presence (or absence) of Others -- a friend, a lover, a spouse, an anam cara -- in one's life, is not determinative of one's worth.
Even when there are such Others, there will be times when you are tremendously aware that you are very much Alone. Each Other, like you, inhabits a unique world that revolves around that person alone. Your Others may not recognize when you are pining, or may not realize that you need succor, laughter, help. Your Others may not understand why that news article burns your heart or why a particular memory occasionally surfaces, painfully, in your soul. Your fears may make no sense to Others. Your desires may make even less sense. Others may sometimes be spiteful or selfish. Self-centered. Unkind. Even occasionally cruel. For they are human, just as you are, and they are imperfect.
You must remember: even without Others, you are magnificent. You have the power to explore, to create, to forgive. To be kind. And to love.
You can love your Others, even when they have made you aware of your Alone-ness. You can provide for Others, even when they do not provide for you. And you can -- and must -- love and provide for yourself. Your soul is deserving. Treat it so.
You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection. - Unknown
Here is what I wish for you to know:
There is no One. Your value depends on no One, and on no Others.
The presence (or absence) of Others -- a friend, a lover, a spouse, an anam cara -- in one's life, is not determinative of one's worth.
Even when there are such Others, there will be times when you are tremendously aware that you are very much Alone. Each Other, like you, inhabits a unique world that revolves around that person alone. Your Others may not recognize when you are pining, or may not realize that you need succor, laughter, help. Your Others may not understand why that news article burns your heart or why a particular memory occasionally surfaces, painfully, in your soul. Your fears may make no sense to Others. Your desires may make even less sense. Others may sometimes be spiteful or selfish. Self-centered. Unkind. Even occasionally cruel. For they are human, just as you are, and they are imperfect.
You must remember: even without Others, you are magnificent. You have the power to explore, to create, to forgive. To be kind. And to love.
You can love your Others, even when they have made you aware of your Alone-ness. You can provide for Others, even when they do not provide for you. And you can -- and must -- love and provide for yourself. Your soul is deserving. Treat it so.
You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection. - Unknown
You are worthy, purely because you are you. You are a mystery and a joy. You are no One -- you are your own One.
And in all your imperfect glory, you are Enough.
Found here.
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