Moon Pie

Herself speaks.

So difficult, staying on the "eat right and exercise diligently" wagon.  Here I go, trying again.  

My goal is not necessarily weight loss -- though shedding a few pounds would make my jeans more comfortable, as well as make the purchasing of brassieres less fraught.  (And if truth be told, I would be happier with my body more if it were a wee bit thinner.)  Rather, my aim is, nebulously, to do better.  For starters, I'll work harder at declining foods that I know contribute to headache/migraine; much as I love -- and feel on occasion that I feel I *need* -- chocolate, it is not helping me, for it promptly yields a headache and when I have a headache I am much more inclined to inhale every available carbohydrate.  

Eat better, feel better, eat better.  Circular. 

To this end, I'm going to keep better record of what I eat.  Not in an obsessive every-calorie-counting way, but in a portion-size and variety-conscious manner - a Richard Simmons' Food Mover way. (I do in fact have a Food Mover. I purchased it twenty or so years ago and bring it out periodically when I feel I'm spiraling into bad habits, as I feel I am now. I have dusted the Food Mover off once more.) 

What is a Food Mover, you may ask?  Essentially, it's a wallet-sized plastic booklet with little windows that can be opened and shut; a card, selected for approximately calorie goals, is inserted into the booklet. The card has pictures for a variety of foods - starches, fruits, proteins, vegetables, fats, dairy, and even extras - that show through the windows.  Consume a portion of a particular food and close the appropriate windows.  There are booklets to indicate serving sizes -- how much is a window's worth? -- as well as to describe which windows should be closed for representative restaurant items.  Easy peasy. 

Normally I would scold myself for an inability to use self-control and just eat normally and in moderation, without a crutch to remind me how to eat.  Ridiculous, to resort to a pop-culture piece of dieting equipment.  Embarrassing. Silly.  

You know what, though?  Chastising myself isn't helping. It only makes me want to give up and reach for a chocolate bar.  So this time, I'll just be kind to myself. I'll think of it this way:  I write "to do" lists and put reminders in the calendar; surely it's not much different to have a food "to do" list and keep food reminders as well.  If it helps me to normalize my relationship with food, it is a good thing. 

I have a (strong) tendency to be an emotional eater -- feeding feelings, rather than hunger -- so perhaps the routine of keeping track will help me to start looking at food as serving the purpose of fuel, rather than comfort. I shall need find something else to do when I am tempted to turn to food unnecessarily.  Perhaps I will play the piano a bit more. Or attempt a Sudoku or a crossword puzzle. Or work on writing my book.  Productivity will feed the soul, too.  

We shall see how it goes. Wish me luck.  

I want to lose weight by eating nothing but moon pies, which have significantly less gravity than earthier foods such as fruits and vegetables. ― Jarod Kintz, I Want