Unrealistic Expectations

Herself looks after the household.  Most of the time, she enjoys doing so.  There's always a certain satisfaction in the routines of tidying the house, taking care of the laundry, attending to the pets, preparing meals.  The pleasure is magnified when the tasks are separated rather than piled one upon the other; for example, cooking dinner while in the camper-trailer is usually quite enjoyable, because no other tasks require attention simultaneously. 

The tricky part occurs when multitasking is necessary.  It is irritating to listen to the guinea pigs wheeking and begging for vegetables while Herself is in the middle of grating zucchini for the zucchini bread.  It is annoying when the kitchen table is covered with toys and books, because the items must be cleared away before the steadily growing pile of clean laundry can be folded on that surface; yet using the couch as a folding area instead is an impossibility, because the dog fur must be vacuumed off of it first.  And how can a meal be prepared when the dishwasher is full and clean and there are dirty dishes waiting in the sink?

These are the times when Herself looks at the other members of the household and thinks, why cannot they SEE what needs to be done?  Do they not hear the dogs barking to be let into the house?  Do they not notice the basket of folded laundry waiting to be brought upstairs?  Why is that pencil still in that spot on the floor, a day and a half later? 

She understands that other members of the household (and particularly her Beloved) are quite busy, and frequently preoccupied with work or homework.  She wants to ensure that everyone has some time for relaxation and enjoyment, too.  Nevertheless, there are moments when she cannot understand why it is that there is no spontaneous initiative to perform that one tiny task that could easily be done. At the same time, she also loathes asking them to do things - as we all know, Herself would rather chew off her own leg than ask for any help.  So she is caught between the proverbial rock and hard place.

It is her problem, though, not theirs. They are not mind-readers.

She must come to terms with the fact that others will not spontaneously do what Herself feels needs to be done, and that she must, in fact, request assistance.  Perhaps she will start with trying to train them to ask, "What can I do for you?"  It always warms her heart when another poses that question, even if her answer at the moment is, "nothing, thank you."  It will require a concentrated change in how Herself handles matters, and that will be difficult for her.  It is a necessary adjustment, though.  Step by step, and with her consistent effort, she will get the help she would like.