Forgetful

When Herself uses her elliptical trainer, she often passes the time with one or another of various television programs on Netflix - recent examples include Fringe and Eureka.  Both of these series have had as plot points, what seem to be unexpected pregnancies for main characters.  Herself wonders:  why?

We all know that unanticipated pregnancy certainly does happen.  Yet how commonplace is unexpected pregnancy among seemingly well-educated women who have authoritative and complex careers?  Wouldn't such women be especially careful to avoid becoming pregnant unless they were fairly certain that the time was right, career- and family- and support-wise?  In this day and age (both in life and in television programs set during this time period), there are multiple methods of highly effective birth control readily available. Why would they and their partners not avail themselves?

In contemplating such questions, Herself was reminded of an ages-old conversation she had with her Long Term Acquaintance.  At the time, Herself was professionally employed and the sole breadwinner while Beloved Husband finished graduate school, and had just found out that they were expecting Offspring the First.  In discussing the good news with Long Term Acquaintance, Herself remarked that she had been surprised at how easy it had been to get pregnant.  (It had been, in fact, remarkably quick given Herself's slightly complex medical history.)  It was plain remark on the facts, nothing more.  And yet....

Days later in another conversation, Long Term Acquaintance stated that when talking with her friends and relatives about the pregnancy, she had said:  "I told them you forgot to use birth control."

What.

No.

Herself supposes in retrospect that Acquaintance had made an assumption based upon Herself's blossoming career and status as financial supporter of the family; Acquaintance couldn't fathom a pregnancy as being anything other than accidental and disseminated her opinion accordingly. As a result of Acquaintance's imaginings, though, Herself found herself in the ridiculous position of wanting to explain to various people -- near strangers -- that she had, in fact, deliberately chosen not to use birth control.  But what was the point of such a conversation?  The damage had already been done.

Although Herself knew Acquaintance's friends and relatives by sight, she did not ever communicate with them beyond brief polite conversation at rare mutual gatherings.  Now, a flock of individuals had formed an opinion about Herself based on her alleged forgetfulness/carelessness, and Herself had no way to provide her point of view or to contradict Acquaintance's remarks. In essence, Acquaintance had delivered an affront to Herself's intelligence and decision-making capacity and even to her sexuality -- a surprise public shaming at which Herself had no opportunity for self-defense.

To know that her pregnancy with her first child was tied to the seed of a falsehood in others' minds was tremendously upsetting.  Herself imagined, though, that seething in a powerless, resentful rage would likely not be good for her health or the health of the tiny bean of a human within.  She let the matter go.

She has never forgotten, though. And she knows never to make assumptions.  Ever.