Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Space Bubble

Herself, Beloved Husband and Cherished Friend oftentimes go for an evening constitutional. A bit of exercise, a bit of companionship and conversation, and a bit of fresh air, all rolled into one -- it is always good. Herself is quite fond of these walks.

In these summer months, their usual route is a bit more populated with additional walkers, joggers, and bicyclists, as well as strollers and scooters and surprisingly well-behaved dogs.  Although the path is relatively wide, it is helpful to move over as a courtesy for individuals going in the opposite direction. People are mostly affable and polite. It's a pleasant path.

Towards the end of last night's walk, a quiet jogger approached them from behind.  Sometimes the more speedy individuals call out a helpful, "On your left!" or "Excuse me!" to warn those who may not have heard their footsteps - not this jogger, however. He flew on by Herself, and as he did so, his arm brushed Herself's arm.  He sped onward and quickly disappeared up the path.

Herself's thought:
yuck.

Herself does not like to be touched by strangers, particularly unexpectedly. As we've mentioned before, Herself generally prefers to be the initiator of touch, for then she has control over with whom, and for how long, she is in contact.  She has a fairly large personal space sphere, and only certain people have a standing invitation to step into it.  These are her Safe People -- Beloved Husband, the Offspring, her siblings, Cherished Friend, and a few select extended family members.  Others are not welcome without Herself's specific invitation to do so.

It makes Herself uneasy when convention at a social gathering requires a number of physical interactions, such as hugs or close proximity of multiple people, and she occasionally needs to escape the crowd into a quiet space.  The ladies' room is a good place to recoup for a moment when necessary. If briefly removing herself from the crowd is difficult or socially inappropriate, Herself will resort to counter-touch:  she will sit quite near, or keep a hand upon, one of her Safe Persons.  They fortify her personal space sphere, and she is comforted.

As Offspring the Second's graduation, followed the next day by a family reunion, approaches, Herself already begins to feel a trifle uneasy about all the hubbub and extra people involved.  As long as she has her Safe People nearby, though, she will manage fine.  And then, later, she can go for a walk out in the open air, and all will be well again.

This lovely personal space sphere can be found here
Thank you, Sinbad Design, for the photographs of these lovely Micasa Lab Cocoons. 

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