Yesterday, Herself registered Offspring the third for middle school. He is a tad nervous. She is working hard to be a pillar of stability, comfort, and enthusiasm for him. She has already contacted the Vice Principal to try to ensure that Offspring the third's 504 plan has transferred from elementary school, to facilitate accommodation and integration into the middle school world.
She worries quite a bit about what Offspring the third will face this year. The complexity of switching classes; the need to remember multiple homework assignments; having to "suit out" for physical eduction. So many moving parts to the schedule.
Her biggest fear, as always: the bullies. Tender-hearted, quirky Offspring the third has always been a target. His hot buttons are large and easy to press. While he has made significant progress in learning how to navigate social waters, he still regularly requires that someone fling him a life preserver when he is worn out and struggling.
Yesterday, Herself decided was time to have a heart-to-heart with Offspring the third about the Asperger's elephant that sometimes appears in the room with him. More complicated than any 'birds and bees' discussion, it was a delicate dance of description. A pointing out of his personality quirks; an explanation of how such quirks are all part of the way he was made, and that the term 'Asperger's' is commonly used to describe a panoply of quirks like his. A comment that he is slightly different -- not in a bad or wrong way, but in his own way. A cautionary statement that some people look down upon others who are different, and the need for judgement as to whom he tells about his Asperger's. A mention of famous people who also have Asperger's. A brief talk about accommodations in school.
He had no particular questions, and she is not sure how much of an impact the talk has had on him. She knows, though, that it is better he be aware of the terminology that may be applied to him, so that he will understand any overheard, well-meaning whispers and can be matter-of-fact about his own needs. The term, 'Asperger's,' will be a tool for him to gain that little bit of extra understanding that is critical for him to succeed.
Let us hope that all will go as well as possible. Godspeed, Offspring the third, as you delve into middle school. We will be here for you, to gather you and support you, always.