Tuesday, November 24, 2015

Bank of....

Herself speaks.

'Tis the season... for holiday catalogs. So. Many. Catalogs. Some are interesting, some are filled with perplexingly expensive items that I can't imagine anyone actually purchasing. Some are pure schlock.

Today a catalog of jewelry arrived. Although I'm not enamored of large or expensive jewelry, I do like to thumb through those catalogs, just to see. This particular catalog was an equal-opportunity offering -- there were selections for men as well as for women -- that included the money clip shown in the photograph below (my thoughts follow the picture):



For so many reasons.

Primary reason one: if one is a father, one should expect to pay for items for one's offspring on occasion. That doesn't make one a "bank". That makes one a responsible (and occasionally generous) parent.

(I wonder, is it a thing of pride for some dads to be a "bank" for one's children? I can't fathom. But then again, I'm not a dad.)

Primary reason two: where is the "bank of mom" money clip? Is it that women don't use money clips, that it is not offered? What if they do?

I find myself thinking that this is some sort-of-sexist thing, where the patriarch controls the money. Perhaps that's ridiculous to think so. Yet it's a subtle thing that permeates so many things: for example, when we received the check from the insurance company to repair the hail damage to the house, the check was made out to Beloved Husband and the mortgage holder. I'm on the mortgage. I'm on the insurance policy. Why am I not also on the check?

Why is it so easy to dismiss or overlook a woman's involvement in family finances, even when in many households (such as mine) a woman is solely or primarily responsible for ensuring bills are paid and necessities are bought and gifts are purchased?

I may never know the answer. It grates at me, just a tiny bit, each time.

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